Its friday night.......time for a laugh ?.........or not.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this ain’t no ordinary blowjob.
How is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.
What’s another name for a vagina?
The box a penis comes in.
What’s the difference between anal and oral sex?
Oral sex makes your day. Anal makes your hole weak.
What did the penis say to the vagina?
Don’t make me come in there!
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lick-a-lotta-puss.
What’s the best part about sex with twenty eight year olds?
There are twenty of them.
What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a
great year.
Want to know why they say eating yogurt and oysters will improve your sex life?
Because if you eat that stuff, you’re sure to eat anything.
How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.
What did the O say to the Q?
Dude, your dick’s hanging out.
What do you call a smiling Roman soldier with a piece of hair stuck between his front teeth?
A glad-he-ate-her.
What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Beef strokin’ off.
What do you call a guy with a small dick?
Just-in!
Why are men like diapers?
They’re usually full of shit, but thankfully disposable.
What type of bird gives the best head?
A swallow.
What’s better than a cold Bud?
A warm bush.
How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his whopper.
What do you call a guy with a giant dick?
Phil!
Why do walruses love a tupperware party?
They’re always on the lookout for a tight seal.
Why do vegetarians give good head?
Because they’re used to eating nuts.
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.
What’s the best part about gardening?
Getting down and dirty with your hoes.
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
Why are
you shaking? She’s gonna
eat me!
Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?
He only comes once a year.
Aaagh fuck it, lets go from the entree, to the main course...........Mcdonalds style....
Enjoy........or not.